Sunday, March 06, 2005
i will update due to public demand.
i just realized nothing can ever satisfy my carnal appetite or quench my thirst for things that i strongly will. and i mean nothing... except for one. i'm convincing myself it's football.
******
i side with cams... and for all the souls who feel the same [and just dont have the guts to write about their "emotional turmoils"] ; the hurting, the used, the unmindful, the unloved. i couldnt agree with you more. noone even asks what's wrong... noone even tries to console. i know it's melodramatic but hey, a little sensitivity wouldnt hurt. now you all have your own worlds, your own fuckin lives to care for and effing dwell on. you are all happy... and it sucks because your state of being blind you from seeing the bigger picture: your friends are miserable. it just hurts to see myself become invisible in your eyes. and to think that we go from way back... you disappoint me. screw me for being selfish... i know i'm not the only one who's damned.
i hate what i have turned into... but at this point... the only smart thing to do is move forward. what's done is done... no use dwelling on the past because if you do that, you're not really living. call me the devil... a bitch, or whatever it is that pleases your petty fancies. it doesnt bother me anymore. i personally would not let it. i am wicked... i live to have FUN.
i loathe discovering that i was deceived. i'm not an idiot for crying out loud. so please. EVERYONE, i will implore just as cams did... STOP LYING TO ME!!!
but then spare me most details, i can only take so much. coz just now, someone's honesty killed me.
leaving skool nothing to see here at 8:45 PM
{xoxo}
